10 uncanny signs that you’re dating your dad

Not sure where the line between “protective boyfriend” and “substitute father” is?

10 uncanny signs that you're dating your Dad
10 uncanny signs that you're dating your Dad
11 Mar 2015

10 uncanny signs that you're dating your Dad

PHOTOS: Ingimage 

When it comes to questionable boyfriends, you could do a lot worse than dating someone exactly like your father. Not sure where the line between “protective boyfriend” and “substitute father”? Read on. 

1. Dates consist of watching the Chinese news on a Friday night before passing out on the couch
1. Dates consist of watching the Chinese news on a Friday night before passing out on the couch
11 Mar 2015

1. Dates consist of watching the Chinese news on a Friday night before passing out on the couch

Most girls are forced to watch football matches, The Fast and the Furious, Bruce Lee movies, or Star Wars when dating a new guy. But thanks to your boyfriend, you not only know the name of every Chinese news anchor, but you’re an expert in tabloid drama and seedy neighbourhood crime. Welcome to the next fifty years of your life! 

2. He was born two decades ago
2. He was born two decades ago
11 Mar 2015

2. He was born two decades ago

Initially, he struck you as a fine older gentleman. But upon closer inspection, you realise that he’s the father substitute you never knew you always wanted. He’s seasoned, mature, makes a steady income, and always has pearls of wisdom to dispense. 

3. He still uses Windows XP
3. He still uses Windows XP
11 Mar 2015

3. He still uses Windows XP

His phone is a black-and-white Nokia brick, he carries his keys in a fanny pack, and refuses to throw out his cassette tapes from 1995. Also, he still sends you email forwards with flashing neon text. Don’t get us wrong – he’s not one of those people who purposely shuns modern technology because he thinks vintage stuff is cool. He just hates the process of change – as most older dads do. 

4. He and your actual father are like soul mates
4. He and your actual father are like soul mates
11 Mar 2015

4. He and your actual father are like soul mates

If your dad ever proclaims, “Sonny, you remind me of myself when I was a young man,” then congratulations: you are dating your father. Or well, not congratulations, if it’s said in the context of warning you about dating someone who shares his bad habits. 

5. He tries and fails to be in tune with pop culture
5. He tries and fails to be in tune with pop culture
11 Mar 2015

5. He tries and fails to be in tune with pop culture

If your boyfriend thinks that Batman is a member of the Avengers, that Sylvester Stallone is King of the Guys, and that CSI is the best crime drama ever, then…how adorable. You are dating your dad. 

6. He gives you and your friends unsolicited advice
6. He gives you and your friends unsolicited advice
11 Mar 2015

6. He gives you and your friends unsolicited advice

In addition to the usual reminders like “don’t drink and drive,” he constantly tells them to sleep earlier, to avoid eating pizza because it disrupts the qi, and he’s always hawking the benefits of drinking mineral water over distilled water. While this usually annoys you, he always redeems himself by giving advice that is actually insightful and sound – just like what one would expect from their father. 

7. He laughs at his own corny jokes
7. He laughs at his own corny jokes
11 Mar 2015

7. He laughs at his own corny jokes

Not only does your boyfriend love cracking cheesy one-liners, but he uses the same five jokes over and over again (most of them involve wordplay using expressions that haven’t been cool since the 1970s). Everything he says is groan-worthy, but deep down, you love him for it. 

8. He’s always trying to fix things around the house
8. He’s always trying to fix things around the house
11 Mar 2015

8. He’s always trying to fix things around the house

Even though it would be easier to call a plumber, he insists that paying for help is a total waste of money when he can just do it himself. Riiiight. While some girls get lucky with a dad-like guy who actually knows the mechanics indoor plumping, most of us just end of having to take baths at the neighbours’ for three days before he relents.  

9. He taught you how to ride a bike and drive a car
9. He taught you how to ride a bike and drive a car
11 Mar 2015

9. He taught you how to ride a bike and drive a car

How much more dad-like can someone get? He patiently sits in the front seat while you attempt to  parallel park, he says nothing when you spend half the time cycling with one foot on the ground, and he quizzes you over and over again while you cram for the written driving exam. He might be like a dad, but he’s just the best. And anyway, it takes a special type of man to run around for hours in the hot sun to make sure you don’t crash your bicycle into a tree. 

10. He’s endearingly over-protective
10. He’s endearingly over-protective
11 Mar 2015

10. He’s endearingly over-protective

We don’t mean controlling, here. We mean that he’s the type of guy who will always have your back. He’ll do his best to protect you from awkward and dangerous situations, such as hosting his mother for three days while he’s overseas, or giving his incompetent cousin a job interview at your company simply because the guy’s family. He’ll SMS you when you’re out past midnight, get irritated when you eat cereal for dinner, and voice concern when he notices that you’re being manipulated by your friends.


So maybe it’s a little weird that he’s just like your father, but you can console yourself with the fact that one day, he’ll make a great one. 

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