9 steps to snagging a boyfriend at your school reunion

Now that Chinese New Year’s come around, you’ve likely received an invitation to a class reunion dinner. And if you’re single and low on options, you know what that means:  time to scope out your old batch mates for a potential love interest. 

Relationship

PHOTO: Ingimage

Now that Chinese New Year’s come around, you’ve likely received an invitation to a class reunion dinner. And if you’re single and low on options, you know what that means:  time to scope out your old batch mates for a potential love interest. Let the re-connections begin (and of course – romance huat!).

1. Use Facebook to conduct background checks on any potential boyfriends
Now is the best time to hook up during a class reunion. Back in our parents’ day, old classmates actually had to converse at length only to discover that the other person was attached, perennially unemployed, or just a straight-up d-bag. Thanks to Facebook, you can know who to avoid flirting with right away. So if you’re really intent on finding someone, clear two hours off your schedule, pour yourself a glass of wine, and get cozy with the site’s “People You Might Know” tool.

2. Don’t be shallow
Against all odds, your old high school crush is not only single, but he works at a bank, has travelled all over the world, and has acquired an incredible six-pack. Boo-yah! Even more miraculously, the nerdy lab partner you ignored for five years straight has morphed into a rich, handsome, and super eligible bachelor! But don’t brush off the “boring” classmates too quickly. While Hollywood movies would have us believe that old flames never die, or former ugly ducklings make the best partners, real life is rarely so dramatic. Nor do external changes inspire internal ones. So go ahead, give what’s-his-name from your gym class a chance. By looking at him through the lens of adulthood, rather than through the filter of adolescence, you might notice qualities that you would never have appreciated in your youth.

3. Make an entrance
We’re not saying you have to emerge from a white limousine with a flock of doves, but at least try looking happy and put together. This shouldn’t even be that hard, considering that people’s last memory of you (sweating, late, clutching an armful of books) is so unglamorous. Come in sober, fashionably late (don’t want to look too eager), and if possible, make a beeline for an old friend, lest the awkwardness drives you into a sad corner of loneliness.

4. Suit up!
Remember what we said about being shallow? While we’d advise against falling in love with someone just because he got hot, we completely advocate encouraging others to do the same to you. You should do everything you can to look at least marginally better than you did in school, which – once again – is not that hard, considering that most people looked like total nerds back in the day. Slap on some BB cream, blow-dry your hair, and wear something that says “Date me, I’m a successful adult.”

5. Surround yourself with friends
Sorry introverts, but you’re never going to find somebody while hiding in the girls’ toilet. Make sure there are at least two or three other friends attending the event before you go, as they will not only make the reunion less awkward for you, but they’ll contribute to the “cheerleader effect”: that is, the scientifically-proven finding that people are more attractive in groups.

6. Break out of your high school clique
At the same time, you’ll look a lot more approachable mingling with the crowd rather than stuck with your usual posse. Don’t wait for people to come to you. Show some initiative. Catch up with your acquaintances, introduce yourself to strangers, and demonstrate that you have the confidence and the know-how to break out of your comfort zone.

7. Don’t be the person who peaked in high school
Even if your life sucks now compared to ten years ago, there’s got to be something you’re happy about, something you can call your own. Somewhere between bragging and moping lies the sweet spot of “grateful confidence.” You’re proud of what you’ve accomplished in life, while thankful for the opportunities that allowed them to happen. Hate your job? Be happy you even have one, and if you must talk about your plans to resign, then at least focus on what you’re looking forward to rather than on how miserable you are now. Your old classmates (or well, people in general) will feel more attracted to someone whose perspective has matured and whose life is going somewhere – not someone who wallows in pity while comparing herself to her classmates.

8. Bask in the nostalgia
One of the greatest things about finding someone at a class reunion is that you have an automatic ice breaker: school. You can always fill gaps in conversation by reminiscing about classes or teachers. Who did he have for home room? What was the physics teacher’s name again? Was he there during the senior prank? These easy topics will either help you develop a rhythm, or they’ll indicate that it’s time to move on to a different person.

9. Don’t get drunk
Sorry, guys, but partying at age 28 isn’t quite the same as partying at 18. And while 18-year-olds can get away with throwing up rum and Coke all over the bathroom floor, the effect isn’t quite as charming on a grown woman. Rather than downing liquid courage to go talk to that guy you pined over for five years back in 2005, remind yourself that it’s been 10 years since you were a shy, nerdy teenager (and even if you’re still shy and nerdy, word on the street is that guys are into that now). Go over there and knock his socks off! 

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