9 signs your colleague is in love with you

Does your colleague have the hots for you? Here's how to find out 

relationship

PHOTO: Ingimage

Earlier this week, Kate Pang and Andie Chen did the impossible: they woke us up on a Monday morning. The former co-stars, who met on Ch8’s Joys of Life in 2012, announced that they had not only gotten married, but that Kate is 10 weeks pregnant. Wait – what – how – cue collective sputters of amazement.

While their announcement (and the extent of their relationship) were certainly shocking, seeing co-stars get together off-screen is a tale as old as time. It’s more or less like dating someone in your office. Sparks are bound to fly when you spend that many hours with another attractive person. But as anyone who’s ever embarked on a workplace romance knows, the relationship is always preceded by a period of “will-we-won’t-we”. You don’t know if the other person really likes you, or whether he or she is just being nice. The general principle’s pretty simple: If your colleague treats you better than he treats the others, then there’s probably something going on. And if he goes out of his way to get to know you better (while keeping things on a “distance but friendly” level with everyone else), then who knows – you guys could very well be the next Kate and Andie.

Read on to see the most telling gestures that your colleague has the hots for you.

1. He buys your breakfast or coffee on the way to work
Obviously, this doesn’t count if it’s regular protocol for your subordinates to deliver you – the boss – an afternoon cappuccino. But if your colleague makes it a habit to deliver you piping hot drinks first thing in the morning, then it may be only a matter of time before he asks you to grab one with him. He’ll probably try to play it off as “oh, I just so happened to pass by a Starbucks this morning,” but come on. A gesture’s a gesture and he cares enough about you to go out of his way. (Bonus points if he also picks up breakfast food!)

2. He’s always in your line of sight
We promise this isn’t as creepy as it sounds. Okay, it’s creepy if you’re not at all interested in the other person. But if you like him or her at least a little bit, then seeing that person swing by several times a day makes you happier than you’d like to admit. Rather than holing up on the other side of the office, he or she finds silly excuse to pop up at your cubicle, ask you for lunch, or discuss what happened on last night’s TV show.

3. He or she has started dressing better recently
It’s not easy to wake up 20 minutes earlier just to do your hair, fix your makeup, and pick a snazzy outfit. If the colleague who supposedly likes you has upped her fashion game since getting close to you, well, take heart that she’s sacrificed the extra sleep just to impress you.

4. He messages you often just to talk about random things
Now here’s one that’s tricky to interpret. On the one hand, colleagues chat with each other on messenger platonically all the time. Don’t go crazy just because your coworker randomly spammed you with corgi gifs over chat. But you’re allowed to go a little crazy if he starts asking you about your hopes and dreams. If he’s actively trying to know who you are on a deeper level, than you can bet that he sees you as more than just his cubicle neighbour.

5. He remembers your birthday and even buys you a present
Remembering your birthday is one thing (thank you Facebook). But if he buys you a card, a cake, or a present (without being prompted by anyone), then heck yeah, he secretly wants to take things to the next level. If you need extra proof, then just wait until the holidays. If he gives you something handmade or more extravagant than the rest – well, you’re probably at the top of his Christmas list this year.

6. He OTs just so you can leave at the same time
This should be pretty obvious, but what can we say: if you’re in denial about your colleague’s feelings, then you’ve probably assured yourself that he just has a lot of work to do. We know this is veering into stalker territory, but if you like him back, then it’s all good.  Obviously, he shouldn’t stick around till 11 pm just waiting for you (ah, desperation – not a good look), but if he dallies for an extra 15 minutes just so you can walk out together, then don’t be too creeped out. He just wants some of that valuable 1:1 time. D’awww.

7. Your 1-1 meetings end up being an hour long
While most meetings consist of zipping through the agenda, you and this dude like to take your sweet time discussing each point. It’s kind of like those magical moments in school when the teacher assigns you to work on a project with your person you’ve had a crush on all semester. The endless discussions and delegating would normally put you to sleep, but when the two of you are in meetings, time flies faster than it does on a half day.

8. He makes an effort to meet up with you after work or on the weekends
Unless the two of you were already friends prior to being colleagues, it’s safe to assume that he or she’s developed an attraction to you. Your colleague already sees you five times a week, for 10 hours at a time -- does he really need to see you for Saturday brunch? Sounds like a date-in-the-making to us.

9. He puts helping you out ahead of his own work
On the one hand, he could be a really nice, unselfish person. On the other hand, offices are inherently a little competitive. We all help each other from time to time, but listen to your gut if it tells you that he’s doing much more than what is required, and at an inconvenience to himself. It’s one thing to help you organise a few files, it’s another to spend two hours on a Friday night helping you reconfigure a botched-up Excel sheet.  Looks like your colleague’s quite a catch. 

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