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8 ways to win over your father-in-law

Father's Day is around the corner -- here's how to make a good impression on your S.O.'s dad

How to impress your father-in-law
29 May 2016

How to impress your father-in-law

Images: TPGOPEN

You've won her heart. Now it's time to win over her father. The in-law relationship can be complicated; there's a reason it's often stigmatised. But no matter how old-school or intimidating your father-in-law might be, he's here to stay. And his approval means a lot. A good bond with your father-in-law not only benefits your marriage but also helps you fit in with the rest of the family. Here are eight ways to impress your significant other's dad.

Show your appreciation for your dad by giving him a surprise this Father’s Day. For more information, visit www.toggle.sg/celebratingfathers.

Talk confidently when you talk about your work
29 May 2016

Talk confidently when you talk about your work

Guys, your SO's father thinks she deserves to be with the CEO of the world. Now, you don't have to be or even pretend to be one to win him over. What he's really trying to find out is if you're dependable and driven. "Does this person have a direction? What does my child's future look like with him?" These are the questions going on in his mind. So no matter what field you're in, even if you're entry level, you need to sound proud of what you do, and determined to succeed at it. Truth is, no parent wants their kid to be with someone lazy. As long as you sound like a hardworking person who can help make your spouse's easier in the future, you're okay.

Laugh at your father-in-law's jokes
29 May 2016

Laugh at your father-in-law's jokes

As corny as they might be. 

Observe and remember it's the little things that count
29 May 2016

Observe and remember it's the little things that count

Pay attention to what your father-in-law likes. Let's say you're going out for dinner together, and you already know he has a sweet tooth. Automatically order him an ice kachang for dessert. Or when you're all at home and he's watching TV, set a bowl of sweet white fungus soup in front of him without asking him if he wants it. (Don't worry about whether he'll eat it or not; he will.)

Always dress appropriately
29 May 2016

Always dress appropriately

Crop tops and miniskirts aren't a good idea. Same with plunging necklines. Not saying that you're doomed to a lifetime of looking like someone's aunt, but presentation matters. 

Use money responsibly
29 May 2016

Use money responsibly

Show your responsibility by saving for a lifetime together and not just spending on immediate luxuries. When your father-in-law sees all the shopping you do, an alarm goes off in his head. He's thinking how hard his child has to work to fund your spendings. He's wondering how long you guys will have to save to buy a house and retire comfortably.

Be a kids person
29 May 2016

Be a kids person

As in, some way or another, give indication that you like children or that you're capable of liking them. If there's a baby on sight, be friendly and say how cute it is. When your SO asks if you want to hold his drooly baby nephew, saying no is not an option. You'll come across as hostile and un-fun. No matter how awkward or terrified you feel, just hold the baby for a minute. Even 10 seconds will do. Because your SO's father will be watching and he probably wants grandchildren one day, so if you seem like someone who melts into a puddle at the sight of cute fluffy puppies but is totally "meh" toward kids, he's going to have some reservations.

Now, you may not want to have kids ever, but you should still make the effort to engage with the young ones. Initiate, play with them and try to make them laugh. It's a fact of life that if kids love you, you appear more trustworthy.
 

Keep your quarrels private
29 May 2016

Keep your quarrels private

Every couple has its ups and downs, but try as best as you can not to fight with your spouse in front of your father-in-law. Openly criticising or complaining about your spouse makes them lose face. As well-founded as your complaints might be, to your father-in-law, you probably seem difficult to get along with. No parent feels comfortable watching their kid get scolded. 

Build up your spouse
29 May 2016

Build up your spouse

Going off of the previous point, whenever you can, build up your spouse in front of their family. Be encouraging of your spouse's decisions -- especially when it comes to their career, parenting choices, and what restaurant they want to eat at. Always back them up. It's not the same as being a blindly agreeable meekling, it's about showing your support. Because really, that's what every single father wants -- for his kid to be with someone who treats them well, and will be there for them no matter what.

Related:
Father’s Day activities your dad will appreciate
Famous dads celebrating Father’s Day for the first time
6 common marriage problems and how to fix them

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